NewBeginnings

I know that God has lead me back to him & away from just believing that he exists & that Christ died for my sins.  It is now more than just a belief, it’s a knowledge of how true this really is, rather than a hope that it’s the best way of thinking given the choices.

 The Bible studies that I have gone to after being invited to the first one by Julie Caldwell.  The Beth Moore Bible study “living beyond yourself exploring the fruit of th Spirit was the start to waking me up & showing me the truth is more than just hoping that what I am thinking is right.  Top that of with the Bible studies at church & Pastor Whittens sermons, this has been a year of learning & understanding things I have never understood before.  How Christianity came across as a child was no where close to the reality of what Christianity is.  Simple things like Christ didn’t come into existance when he was born of Mary in Bethlehem……He existed from the beginning with God as did the Holy Spirit…..who I thought only came along after Christ died & went back up to heaven on Penticost.  Add to this, I decided to read Paul Meier’s book Eusebieus, The church History which gave huge insight as to the history that was going on around the time of Christ’s life here on earth & the first 3 centuries after he died.  History only reinforces the truth of God’s existance & makes the beliefs come real.

I have come up with one realization that is why I think I had so much trouble with the concept of God in the first place.  Whenever someone comes across as if they know everything & want to be treated special because they have done special things, thinking that they are owed praise & glory for what they have done or who they are, I always tell them….who do you think you are, God.  What makes you think that you deserve to be treated special.  Well, I figured out what my problem is.  I have always thought that trait of thinking you are so good is a negative trait.  Arrogant & not a good thing.  So then comes God who created us for his Glory & praise…….wow, how arrogant.  I realize that was my feeling.  I have held that trait as being so negative all my life that even though God definitely deserves all Glory, Honor, & praise, I have this mental block with those traits being negative rather than it being something that he truely deserves.  Thinking that heaven is all about nothing but giving Glory, Honor, & praise to God forever, in my human mind, it seems that there has to be more to do than just that.  How Satan takes something so beautiful as giving honor, praise, & glory to God & turning it into a negative thought, it just how Satan works.  This thinking is something that I am praying to God that he will help me work on, as truely, I can think of nothing more wonderful than not having anything more to do than give God praise, Honor, & glory.  But when you have spent all your life looking at that trait as being a negative arrogant trait, it’s amazing how much it takes to realize that it doesn’t apply to God.  It took me quite awhile to figure out & put words to how I was feeling & thinking about this